핵심 개념
作者透過描寫自己麻木、空洞的情緒狀態,以及對周遭人們機械式生活的觀察,表達了對現代生活方式的質疑,認為人們被困在無意義的工作中,失去了對生活的熱情和目標。
초록
作者以十月初的第一場雨為開端,引發了對自身狀態的反思。她形容自己處於一種難以言喻的情緒中,既不快樂也不悲傷,像是地球停止轉動般的停滯。她觀察周遭的人們,日復一日重複著同樣的生活模式,如同機器人般運作,卻不清楚這樣做的意義何在。作者對此感到悲傷,認為人們將寶貴的生命浪費在朝九晚五的工作中,無法追求熱愛的事物,失去了生命的活力。她將這種狀態比喻為行屍走肉,對這種麻木不仁、缺乏目標的生活感到厭惡和困惑。
인용구
“I am not happily existing nor in the tragic phase of surviving. It’s not in chaos, not even peaceful. It’s pale but not blurry. It’s as if the earth has stopped revolving.”
“They seem like some advanced form of robots, repeating the same patterns of behavior every day, but for what? They don’t know but probably for survival, I guess.”
“I often feel so sad thinking we get one life in this world and spend it doing 9 to 5s, not pursuing what we love, and working like robots for 40 to 50 years of our lives. This isn’t life. This shouldn’t be life.”
“My mind is getting more insane every time I watch myself walk like a dead body. It’s like I’m in a moderate, yes definitely, I’m in a moderate state of my emotions. I feel something but not sure what the feeling is. And hell, I don’t like it. And I’m sure, no one would want to be like this, to not feel anything good at…”