Reflections on the Challenges and Disappointments of Pursuing an MFA at Columbia University

Core Concepts

The author's MFA experience at Columbia University was a disappointing and frustrating journey, marked by a sense of unfulfilled potential and the realization that adulthood does not always live up to the dreams of youth.

Abstract

The author reflects on their experience pursuing an MFA degree at Columbia University, which they describe as akin to "two years of botched surgery." Despite reading a lot of books during the program, the author expresses a sense of disillusionment with the realities of adulthood, which often fall short of the idealized vision of possibility that is instilled in young people.

The author notes that as we grow older, our desires and wants become more intense, while the possibilities for fulfilling them diminish. This is likened to the paradox of time, where each passing year seems faster because it represents a smaller portion of one's total life.

The author delves into the various challenges and frustrations of adulthood, such as dealing with bills, cramped living situations, difficult roommates, the desire to lash out at employers, the crippling burden of student loan and credit card debt, and the arduous commute and interactions with strangers that can sour one's day before it even begins.

The author reflects on the decision to "fast-forward" through youth, trading the nostalgia and innocence of childhood for the realities of adulthood, and wonders whether the trade-off was worth it.

Stats

None.

Quotes

"You can't really know what it is to want things until you're at least 30. And then with each passing year, it gets bigger … because the want is more, and the possibility is less. Like how each passing year of your life seems faster because it's a smaller portion of your total life. Like that. But in reverse. Everything becomes pure want."

Key Insights Distilled From

My Columbia MFA Experience Was Like Two Years of Botched Surgery

by Felicia C. S... at felsull.medium.com 09-02-2024

https://felsull.medium.com/my-columbia-mfa-experience-was-like-two-years-of-botched-surgery-5ad606a67f67

Deeper Inquiries

What factors or experiences led the author to pursue an MFA at Columbia University, and how did their expectations differ from the reality they encountered?

The author’s pursuit of an MFA at Columbia University likely stemmed from a combination of aspirations for artistic growth, the prestige associated with Columbia’s program, and a desire to immerse themselves in a vibrant literary community. The allure of an MFA often includes the promise of mentorship from established writers, the opportunity to refine one’s craft, and the potential for networking within the literary world. However, the author’s experience suggests a stark contrast between these expectations and the reality of the program. Instead of a transformative journey filled with inspiration and support, the author likens their experience to "two years of botched surgery," indicating a sense of disillusionment and frustration. This metaphor implies that the program may have felt more like a painful process than a nurturing environment, leading to unmet expectations regarding personal and professional development.

How might the author's perspective on the trade-offs between youth and adulthood be influenced by their specific circumstances, such as their financial situation, living arrangements, or career aspirations?

The author’s perspective on the trade-offs between youth and adulthood is likely shaped by their financial burdens, living conditions, and career aspirations. The mention of "bills, cramped apartments, roommates and their strange nocturnal habits" paints a picture of a challenging adult life that contrasts sharply with the idealized notion of freedom and opportunity often associated with adulthood. Financial stress, particularly from student loans and credit card debt, can exacerbate feelings of regret about rushing into adulthood, as it may limit one’s ability to pursue passions or take risks. Additionally, the author’s career aspirations, possibly tied to their MFA experience, may create a sense of urgency that clashes with the realities of the job market, leading to a feeling of being trapped in a cycle of unfulfilled desires. This complex interplay of circumstances contributes to a nuanced understanding of how adulthood can sometimes feel like a series of compromises, where the weight of responsibilities overshadows the joys of youthful exploration.

What insights or lessons can be drawn from the author's experience that could be applicable to other individuals considering or pursuing advanced degrees or the transition to adulthood?

The author’s experience offers several valuable insights for individuals contemplating advanced degrees or navigating the transition to adulthood. First, it highlights the importance of setting realistic expectations. Aspiring students should critically assess what they hope to gain from an MFA program and recognize that the experience may not align with their idealized vision. Additionally, the author’s reflections on the burdens of adulthood underscore the necessity of financial planning and awareness of the potential long-term implications of student debt. Prospective students should consider the return on investment of their education and how it aligns with their career goals. Lastly, the author’s narrative serves as a reminder to embrace the complexities of adulthood, acknowledging that it often involves trade-offs and sacrifices. By fostering resilience and adaptability, individuals can better navigate the challenges that come with pursuing advanced education and the realities of adult life, ultimately leading to a more fulfilling and balanced existence.