Effective Strategies for Making Friends as an Adult

Core Concepts

Initiating connections, assuming positive outcomes, and showing vulnerability are key to making friends as an adult.

Abstract

Making friends as an adult requires deliberate effort, overcoming fears of rejection, and initiating interactions. Assuming people like you can lead to positive outcomes. Research shows that repeated interactions and vulnerability deepen friendships over time.

Stats

An American study from the 1980s found that volunteers who believed their interaction partner liked them acted in ways to make this belief come true. Research by Erica J Boothby at Cornell University revealed that strangers like us more than we realize. Study of older adults in Manitoba showed those who thought friendship took effort were less lonely five years later. American psychologists Nicholas Epley and Juliana Schroeder found no risk of social rejection when participants initiated conversations with strangers on a train. Rebecca G Adams highlighted the importance of continuous interaction for thriving friendships.

Quotes

"People underestimated how much they were liked, a phenomenon that Boothby and her colleagues labelled ‘the liking gap.’" "Initiation is particularly important for people who find themselves in new social settings." "The lesson here is that if you want to make friends, you should commit to showing up somewhere for a few months."

Key Insights Distilled From

How to make friends as an adult | Psyche Guides

by at psyche.co 02-21-2024

https://psyche.co/guides/how-to-make-new-friends-when-youre-busy-with-adulthood

Deeper Inquiries

How can the concept of vulnerability be applied in other areas of life beyond friendship building?

Vulnerability is a powerful tool that can be applied in various aspects of life beyond just forming friendships. In professional settings, being vulnerable with colleagues or superiors can foster trust and open communication, leading to more effective teamwork and problem-solving. In romantic relationships, sharing vulnerabilities can deepen emotional intimacy and strengthen the bond between partners. Additionally, in personal growth and self-improvement endeavors, embracing vulnerability allows individuals to confront their fears and insecurities, leading to greater self-awareness and resilience.

What potential drawbacks could there be in always taking the initiative in forming relationships?

While taking the initiative in forming relationships is crucial for building connections, there are potential drawbacks to consider. Constantly initiating contact or activities may lead to feelings of burnout or exhaustion if not reciprocated by others. It could also create an imbalance in the relationship dynamics if one person consistently takes on the role of initiator without allowing space for mutual effort from both parties. Moreover, always being the one to initiate may result in feeling unappreciated or undervalued if efforts are not acknowledged or reciprocated by others.

How does the research on assumptions about being liked apply to online interactions where physical presence is not a factor?

The research on assumptions about being liked has implications for online interactions where physical presence is not a factor. In virtual environments such as social media platforms or online communities, individuals often make assumptions about how they are perceived by others based on likes, comments, or engagement with their posts. By adopting a mindset that assumes positive regard from others online, individuals may feel more confident engaging with new people virtually and initiating conversations without fear of rejection. This positive assumption can influence their behavior positively towards creating meaningful connections even through digital means where physical presence is absent.